Robert was fully employed and cared deeply for his 2 children from his previous marriage. When the marriage ended in 2021, Robert scraped together everything he had to hire a private attorney. At the time, the children were still young, in daycare and he was ordered to pay $1700/mo in child support which was more than half his monthly income of $2300/month from his two jobs. Robert made sacrifices in the best interest of the children, but even then Robert was on the verge of poverty. Hear Robert’s full story:
We moved here seven years ago from Texas with the hopes of starting fresh with the family, myself, my then wife, and our two daughters. Things don’t always work out the way you expect them to, but that’s part of life and you just keep pushing through.
I was served papers for a no fault divorce and that’s when this crazy journey began. I had no family here, no friends, we moved here with her parents. She had somewhere to be and I did not. There were a few nights I slept in the car and this was right around the time that there was the worst snow storm here, so it was super cold and uncomfortable. I told myself that I had to stick around and not go to Texas. My daughters were very young at the time and if I had done that, they wouldn’t have really any memory of me.
Ended up going to court. Scrounged up some money to pay for a lawyer to represent me so I’d be treated as fairly as possible. It didn’t go so well. Initially, the judge had me paying $1700 a month. With two jobs I was making about $2300-2400 a month. That didn’t leave me much at all. Then you’ve got to think about the 5% fee to the courts, a third party app that I had to pay through, it all went to right over $1800 per month.
I had to move out of the house that I was in, where me and my daughter spent their overnights because I would get them every other weekend and I moved in with a buddy and thought to myself, this is it. I am never going to get out of this hole, have my own place. I am going to have to work two or three jobs from here on out just to make it. At mediation, we agreed on $1400 a month. A little bit better, wasn’t what I expected, but I was running out of money. I was exhausting everything I had.
A majority of that was for daycare, because the girls were so young. After our oldest started school, my ex-wife became pregnant and became a stay-at-home mom. Then there was no need for daycare at all. I reached out to their mother and said, now that there's no daycare can we try to get this child support down a little bit so that I can provide them with the same opportunities that you are, be able to have a place where they can stay and spend the night. Her reply was, we're not going to discuss child support, if you don’t like what you are paying, you can take me to court. I'm thinking to myself that she knows that I don't have the money to get another lawyer. I thought, this is it, I’ll be paying this for the next 14 years. I mean that is scary to think about.
It was a tough situation, but I just kept pushing. Through the Father to Father program I was attending, I got support, and then through CLA I was able to get great representation at a very affordable price. When I heard about it, I had to jump on it. This was the answer to my prayers, I needed something to help me. I had exhausted all of my money on my initial lawyer and I felt like I got a pretty crummy deal.
“The love that I have for my daughters is all the motivation I needed to keep pushing, so I never gave up. When I heard about what CLA was willing to offer me and how they would represent me and take on my case, I had to do it. It was more affordable for somebody like me, and I couldn’t give up on my daughters, so I thought I’d give it a shot and see what happens and it was the best thing ever.”
We went back to court. The judge ruled in my favor, knocked it down from $1400 to $630 a month. That was amazing. Through that I was able to get my own apartment and have the girls overnight.
“CLA gave me a fighting chance. It put me in a position to be the dad that I wanted to be the whole time.”
I was able to get my own place, able to have the girls back, had a little extra money in my pocket- now things were fair. I was able to breathe again.
I had been in the apartment for two or three months and I received a message from their mother saying that they were going to relocate, her new husband was in the air force and was being reassigned.
I got this fear, where are they going, how far. Come to find out, they got Alaska. Because I love my daughters so much, I am happy for them. They are going to get to see things that I would never be able to see. But now we needed to establish new parent-child time. I was still represented by CLA. We sat down at a mediation, it lasted 7-8 hours I believe. It was a long day, but in the end the lawyers that I had representing me, Mr. Robert Darby, amazing guy, and Ms. Lisa Russell. She came in at the end of my case and sat in on the mediation with me. They were just on point and did everything they could for me. The agreement we came to was that child support would be dropped. Didn’t actually find that as a win. It’s never been about the money for me. I would rather continue paying child support and get to pick my girls up every other weekend.
And then still alternate the holidays and I’ll see them for two weeks during the summer. So it was a really good deal overall considering how things were playing out. But if I hadn’t heard about Father to Father or CLA, I think I would have been in a very bad spot. I wouldn't have the rights that I do now. It would have been very difficult for me to visit. Just the thought of it is very scary. Even going back to when I was sleeping in the car and didn't know where to go or who to turn to, a foreign place to me. If I go back to Texas, I have family, a place to stay. I’ll be fine there, but then I am erasing myself from my daughters’ memories in a sense. I wasn’t going to do that. No matter how difficult the situation was at the time and how scary it was.
It was a long, very interesting, and difficult road. I had to endure a lot and I feel like I got very beat down during the process, but like I said, the love that I have for my daughters is all the motivation I needed to keep going. Through Father to Father and CLA, they helped pick me back up, put me back in there and don’t give up, we’ve got you and it was amazing. Just the way that everything came out. It couldn’t have been better.
“To other fathers or mothers that are experiencing or have experienced something like I went through, if you don’t know where to start or where to turn, Charleston Legal Access is where to start.”
That's where you need to go. They're affordable, they are for the community. I can speak from experience, they absolutely got me a fair treatment and I feel like justice was served throughout the whole process. This is where you need to start if you are in a difficult legal situation and you don't know where to turn or where to begin, come here. Get in touch with the attorneys who are amazing, they know what they are doing. They can help you navigate through the legal system and I believe that they are going to get the outcome that you are looking for.
About Charleston Legal Access
Charleston Legal Access is SC's first and only sliding-scale, nonprofit law firm. We provide affordable legal services at a price that those of moderate means can afford. Hourly rates are determined on an individual basis by a client's income and family size. Our initial screening and phone consultations with an attorney are completely free. In-person, 1-2 hour case consultations and limited assistance sessions are available for a flat fee of $50-$100. For more information please visit www.charlestonlegalaccess.org.
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